tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
i think i have two assholes
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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