My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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