no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
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