What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
