You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
Randomize
