yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Randomize
