hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize