my vag is so smooth its legendary
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
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