If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
