Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
