How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Randomize
