so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
