This dress was meant to end up on your floor
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
