we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
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