have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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