Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
sarcasm needs its own font
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Randomize
