Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize
