My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Randomize
