Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
she woke up with a sticky ear
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
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