Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Randomize
