So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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