I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Randomize
