dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
