It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
Randomize