I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
Randomize
