Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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