How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
