TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
Randomize
