Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
My vagina is officially offended.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
