so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Randomize
