suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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