but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Randomize
