At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
and you fell through a lawn chair
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Randomize