We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
