I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
This is the high leading the old right now
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
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