I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Randomize
