i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
