i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
smell my finger.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
