I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Randomize
