Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
