I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
