This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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