i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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