this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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