I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
