Kiss
Puke
The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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