Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
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