its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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