This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
