We should be called the Road Head Warriors
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
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