If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
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